After much procrastination, here I am again, back in the bloggers chair. It's not that I don't want to blog - I think about it a couple of times a week. But the reality of my life at the moment is that I don't know what my desk looks like (other than to say that it is a total mess) because I get to sit at it for around 30mins a day if I am lucky. That sounds pretty normal, you say? It might be normal if I was only at school from 8.30 till 3.30, but my school day at the moment starts at 7.30 and ends at 5.30. I am getting very little work done at school other than some photocopying and it seems that my days consist largely of me teaching, running around like a chook with my head cut off and sitting in meetings. Add to that a large dose of wedding planning (have finally set a date and booked a venue) and I am pretty tired and pretty pinched for spare time.
But, having said that, life at the moment (school included) is good. My Year 7's are adorable (and we are at week five so normally their cuteness would have started to wear off by now!), I adore both of my year 11 classes and my year 12's (despite seriously keeping me on my toes) also seem to be doing the work that I am asking of them and so should do well on thier first sac in a week and a half. My english classes (7's and 11's) are just fantastic in terms of me knowing the content and having taught it all before which makes it so easy. This is leaving time for me to worry about my year 12's. Teaching year 12 for the first time, I am putting so much pressure on myself to help my students achieve. I know that only they can learn the content and do the work but you really wish as a teacher that you could ensure the success of all of your students, because you take it as almost a personal defeat if they fail (and despite knowing that is a ridiculous way to think), you do feel like the eyes of the school are on you checking if you are doing a good job.
Because I had the double trouble of having to learn the content myself, I feel like I am only now coming to grips with the course and the content. It seems though, that when you are down or worried, things can go one of two ways - your class will flop, making you feel infinitely worse about the situation and yourself, or your class will be a big success, restoring your faith in the fact that the year 12's are doing the work you are setting and that they are listening to the things you say. The latter happened to me in my double with the 12's on friday afternoon so for the weekend I feel renewed, relieved and maybe even rejuvenated somewhat.
But I will go back to school on Monday, with my head so full of the classes i will be teaching for the day and the memos that I need to write and the emails that I should be sending that I will forget about the meeting that I have on until 2 minutes before hand or I will forget about the dinner that I am organising for Saturday night with my friends (even if we plan it on Friday). I need to get some sort of diary organised because at the moment I can't remember anything for longer than 2 minutes and I am concerned that I will start offending my friends by forgetting to turn up to the functions they have organised. Is this normal or am I a headless (brainless) freak!?
On life outside of school, I actually had some time today to do some gardening which is great because the weeds were literally bigger than some of the plants and I was beginning to think that they had taken over for good. I am also managing to keep up some semblance of an exercise routine which has really been great for my bad back and my sanity! Spent last weekend looking at wedding venues, cooked dinner for the mothers (mine and future-mother-in-law) on Wednesday night to discuss venues and plans, drove back to Arthurs Seat on Thursday in between school and a school function starting at 7 to show said mums the venue and have booked, which means the procrastinating is over and the wedding will happen in March next year! Crazy times ahead!
I am sensing a theme with me and procrastination. Maybe I should do something to make myself more decisive? Maybe I will just think about it for a little bit...
