Sunday, June 04, 2006

Some breathing space...

So I have finally had a chance to breathe this weekend. My reports are written, the new BYTES have started (generally without too much of a hitch), all of my correction is done and I managed to leave school on Friday without anything (including guilt-bag) in tow but my laptop - so nice to have such a light load on my shoulders. This last few weeks have been hectic to say the least. i have had Year 12 English SACS (50 SACs to correct with 4 essays in each), Year 12 History SACS (60 essays) and Year 11 Text Response Essays and exams. The BYTES changeover meant that I ran a six period long Digital Portfolio session for the entire year 9 cohort including producing a 37 page booklet to guide them. I also wrote the new english BYTE (with a little late help from my friend). Needless to say the school buildings and I have become inseparable over these past three weeks to the point where I have been working 12 hour days to get things done (and I still had to take last Wednesday off to get some of my SACS corrected). But I am not complaining. On the contrary it is nice to know that I am capable of such hard work and it is nice that I have the head-space to concentrate on my job so thoroughly. It is almost like I have such a clearer head this year and it is getting me places. I really feel like I can say that I have achieved this year already. I have pushed myself, I have dreamt big and then managed to make most of the dreams become reality in some form. I am happy, professionally, personally and emotionally. I am making decisions for myself about myself and my life and it feels nice to be in control.
In terms of work I feel like I have finally been challenged and given a role that I know that I can perform - something that is brand-new and that I get to make my stamp on. A new program that is being shaped and pushed along by me and that is challenging me but also giving me a sense of autonomy and control that I don't feel that I have had before. Despite the fact that I am at work at 7 in the morning and leaving at 7 at night at the moment, I feel that i am making progress and I am happy with my job right now. I am working the long hours during the week but trying to keep my weekends largely free in order to go out and have fun and let my hair down. So it seems that now, more than ever before I am getting the balance thing right. I am balancing work and play so that neither is suffering. I think it would be interesting if I was still in a relationship though - I think that it would be suffering because I am giving so much at school that when I get home I dont even want to talk (as my sister could tell you).
It is one of the interesting things about teaching I think. The job can be so all consuming and emotionally draining that it is hard to find that balance. It is difficult to switch off at the end of the day (if you are lucky enough to be able to spend enough hours at work to actually get your work done so that you dont have to bring it home). It is difficult not to take your work home with you whether it is planning, correction or even just the relationships. It is difficult to get to sleep some nights with everything going on in my head. But despite the things that make this job hard I love it and at this stage I wouldnt change it for anything.