To teach and what to teach? – That is the question…

It is that time of the year again when I am being asked what I would like to teach next year. To be honest, I have been devoting time to thinking about other things and I am yet to tackle the issue of what I would like to teach. I would certainly like a Year 12 English. I love teaching Year 11 English and would be disappointed to have no Year 11’s at all. Those are the certainties in my mind at the moment. I guess that the major question that I need to answer, for my own benefit and the benefit of the admin staff is whether or not I want to teach Year 12 History next year. History has been hard work this year and it will still be hard work next year because there is so much that I need still to learn. History is such a content based subject that I have spent a lot of this year working on learning the content myself and there is still a long way to go for me in terms of really knowing my content inside and out. So next year, although easier than this year because I know what to expect and I have an idea of the structure and content of the course, will still be hard work because there is so much that I would do differently and still so much for me to learn. The other teacher taking the Year 12 History class is a lot more experienced than me in terms of knowing her content and I feel that perhaps it would be better for the students if she took both classes next year. But I am in two minds. On one hand I feel that History was such hard work this year that it wouldn’t bother me if I didn’t teach it next year. On the other hand I think it would be a shame to waste all of the hard work and effort and planning that I have put in over the year by not building on it next year. In some ways I would love it if the decision was taken out of my hands, but that would be taking the easy way out and I am trying to avoid doing that in my life in general at the moment. So I need to make a decision and as yet are unsure how to go about doing it.
The other uncertainty for me is the new MERC and what sort of a position would be available to me in order to get involved in it. I would love to have some sort of administrative role within the MERC or some sort of position of responsibility that gave me challenges away from the classroom. I was thinking of going back to uni next year to start Honours, but I have decided that it might be better for me in the long term to have next year as a year to myself so that I can take stock of my life and avoid extra pressures on my time. So I am hoping that there will be a position at school that can in some way fill the void left in my life without study. The issue for me is that I am unsure at the moment, as is the administration, of what sort of role would be available in the MERC and so I am unable to make a decision or to know at this stage what the possibilities are for next year. Again the feeling of uncertainty prevails. Such is life in schools though I think…

Thursday 22 September

I’m at school today – in the middle of the school holidays giving a class for my Year 12’s. I wonder sometimes if I am insane. Only 9 out of the 17 turned up and very little constructive work was done by anyone. The students are really struggling to even know where to start to begin their notes and I can see that the majority of the work is going to be done by them at the last minute. I keep trying to remind myself that I can only do so much – I can give them the information, I can give them ideas and strategies as to how to revise, I can give them exam revision questions and offer my time to answer questions, but I cannot force them to do it. If only I could.