Sitting here again (wasting time) and thinking about the idea of dreams. I am in a situation at the moment where I am being forced to think about what I want from my life. When I was in a long-term relationship, my notion of what I wanted from my future was coloured by what people, including my partner, expected of my future. I have never really been a dreamer, rather quite practical and I like to deal with problems and issues as they arise. However for the first time in my life I feel as though I am expected to have an idea of what I want from my future, and I can’t say that I have any. Is that a bad admission to make? I feel as though people are congratulating me for being brave and following my heart and encouraging me to follow my dreams, but I don’t think that I really have any dreams. Do I need to have a definite notion of what I want out of life?
When I think of the notion of a dream I think of something that is all encompassing, something that you strive for against the odds, something that makes you motivated to achieve. I think that I have short term goals, but not anything that I would classify as a dream, and I am feeling a distinct lack of motivation at the moment. Do I need a dream or something to work towards to spur me on? I think that I have always wanted to go back to uni and do my honours, then eventually a PhD. I don’t know why, just think that I have always wanted to. Is this a dream or do I need to have a deep seated motivation that is driving me?
Maybe you don’t need dreams to be a successful person and to be happy. Maybe it is enough that I try in my everyday life to do the best that I can in all aspects of my life. Maybe for me the dream is simply to constantly challenge myself and to rise to the challenge in the best way that I know how. Maybe I don’t need some all encompassing dream to spur me on other than the need to feel fulfilled in what I do. At the moment my career is providing me with that challenge and that sense of fulfilment and maybe this blog has just helped me come to a conclusion about whether or not to go back to study next year. I think that if the only thing that I am certain about at the moment is that I would eventually like to go back and study then what am I waiting for?
5 comments:
for what it's worth i think it's a lot of pressure to have to have a 'grand dream' to live up to. life is hard enough! i just hope to treat myself and others with respect each day - and there are many days when that's not achieved! but what's good is that i'm getting much better at *not* giving myself a hard time about stuffing up on a *ridiculously regular* basis in all areas of my life.
if you've got a dream - fantastic.
if you haven't - equally fanatastic.
but always, whenever and wherever possible, be kind to yourself!
I don't know the answer, but an alternative way to consider it, is that dreams may be something people have to make up for their lives being unsatisfactory on an everyday basis. Sort of like, well, I'm completely unhappy in all areas of my life, but that's OK because I'm working towards x or y.
Some days I need that sort of future promise to get me through, but ultimately, we only get one life, and we only get to do it once. So if the day to day reality of your life makes you happy, then that's as much as we can hope for ourselves. The unexamined life may not be worth living, but I don't think there's much to get out of a life which is solely spent in contemplating what you might do.
Keep thinking and questioning, but it's OK to just be, too.
love b
I think that being the best person you can be is a wonderful dream to be striving for.
Often what characterizes a dream is it’s ‘unattainabitily’. People often frame talk of their dreams in terms of regrets and things that prevented them from achieving their dreams. In this case I wonder if they really are a useful thing.
There is nothing wrong with just being and trying to be happy. Happiness is not a state of existence but a frame of mind and as such will operate independently of any conscious or unconscious dreams.
Hello Darce, I found your blog by following a few links. It's a really interesting read, so I've created a link to it from my own blog (http://nmcqcareer.blogspot.com). I hope you don't mind. I've only just started blogging, so it's in its early stages, but I'm hoping to develop it over time. Thanks.
Eep. I don't think anyone is expecting anything from you. You where unhappy, you made a change, now your happy. I think it takes a lot fo time to get over what you have been through, so I wouldn't be putting any extra pressure on myself to have a grand dream.
I think you should go back and study some more, from seeing what I saw at Monash, I think that it's the right thing to do!!
I really don't think you need a dream to give you purpose, in fact, I think it is the exact opposite.
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